What is this About! I am my own worst enemy...

Binging – really! Here I am thinking I am so in control - I am struggling a bit, but my mind is set right and

then… I start eating and have not stopped for three days. Now what is this about???

I’m afraid of letting go of the extra weight and why. It is so self-sabotaging after doing so well. I just need to stop thinking like that and jump back on the horse and ride.

Now I am tired and depressed; I am sure my blood sugar is high, which has been normal for weeks is spiking out of control. I am going to kick myself in the rear – good hell woman gets with it!!

It's the same-old story that drinkers use - well I am going to get sober tomorrow so I'd better drink all I can tonight. That is right I am back depriving myself tomorrow what else do I want? I know I will run to the store! Buy whatever I like - I am not hungry but what the heck.. 

Another thing why do I use words like deprive - that is defeating in itself.... Ugh.